Foot in the sand

Head in the sand, sounds bad... foot in the sand feels good.

After crying feels better.

Lately I am revolving the ground under my foot, searching for solid base.

This process of living and dying each day, falling and standing, hormones working, head down or up, in which roots I stand, keep me busy.

But searching too far, does the same as I search anything, only buries my head in the sand.

At this moment, keeping my head up depends on my search just nearby, around my eyes view.

Look the sun rising, the shadows growing longer, the grass frozen, later on the year greener, being calm enough to not disturb myself with my intern fight, questioning, criticism, doubts, perfectionism, angriness, sorrow, idealism, dreams, unquietness.

My full head empty in art making, mixing all in one. Colors, forms, materials, not purposely the result is often: simple, sort of balance, harmony? maybe I wish to be like the nature, maybe that is my need, ambition or my Japanese gene, I do not know.

I just would like to feel my foot in the sand base ground, calm, be lost of myself in the sea horizon. My brainstorm be washed away.